I hope mine doesn't look like that
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
