The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
