Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
