i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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