i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
