What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize