The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Success! We fucked roommates!
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