She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
