I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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