she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
They are going to name an STD after you.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize