im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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