Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
