what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
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He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
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The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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