I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
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