were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Randomize
