margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
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