Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Randomize
