in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
