tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
