Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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