so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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