She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
