You made me cry and you don't even care
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
