im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
