are you still at the devil's house?
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Randomize
