I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
