Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
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you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
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It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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