yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
