yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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