I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
