every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Randomize
