I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
