Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
