its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
