thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
