Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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