For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Randomize
