walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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