foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize