Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
