Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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