Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
