just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Green mimosas i think yes
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
