I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
These Are 19 of the Most Horrible Strangers People Had to Sit Next to
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.