he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
