Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
No more Irish car bombs ever.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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