There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
