I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
