farters have to be the big spoon...
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
fuck your aforementioned shoe
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
