walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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