My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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